[NPInfo] Better than a pun - humor

[Christine Smith]

Subj: Aliens

 

Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near a gas station that was closed 

for the night. They approached one of the gas pumps and the younger alien 

addressed it saying, 'Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to 

your leader.'

 

The gas pump, of course, didn't respond.

The younger alien became angry at the lack of response.

The older alien said, 'I'd calm down if I were you.'

The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting.

Again, there was no response.

 

Annoyed by what he perceived to be the pump's haughty attitude, he drew his 

ray gun and said impatiently, 'Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Do 

not ignore us this way! Take us to your leader or I will fire!'

 

The older alien again warned his comrade saying, 'You probably don't want to


do that! I really don't think you should make him mad.'

'Rubbish,' replied the cocky, young alien. He aimed his weapon at

the pump and opened fire. There was a huge explosion. A massive fireball 

roared towards them and blew the younger alien off his feet and deposited 

him a burnt, smoking mess about 200 yards away in a cactus patch.

 

Half an hour passed. When he finally regained consciousness, he

refocused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna, and looked dazedly 

at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his big, green 

head.

 

'What a ferocious creature!' exclaimed the young, fried alien. 'He

damn near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?'

The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy

friend and replied, 'If there's one thing I've learned during my

intergalactic travels, you don't want to mess with a guy who can wrap his 

penis around himself twice and then stick it in his ear.'